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Tee it Up for Spencer

Memorial Golf Tournament

In-Person Event Cancelled

Due to the current medical and public concerns regarding COVID-19, the in-person aspect of Tee It Up For Spencer will be cancelled. The health and safety of all including our families, community members and partners, is our top priority. With guidance from the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), World Health Organization (WHO) and U.S. State Department we do not feel comfortable hosting such an event.

 

That being said, we will still be taking donations in hopes to raise money for Faith’s Lodge accompanied by FOD (Fatty Oxidation Disorders) Family Support Group and Hopeful Heart Project helping families after the loss of a child. Through our golf events to date, we have raised over $14,500 for these organizations.

 

If you purchased tickets for this event, the amount spent will be considered a charitable donation that is 100% tax deductible unless you request a refund. To request a refund please contact Jessica Siefken at teeitupforspencer@yahoo.com or 701-446-7814.

 

Tee It Up For Spencer remains committed to our purpose of honoring, John “Spencer” Reimer II, by helping other families who have to face the tragedy of losing a child. I am truly grateful for your donation to help aid families.

 

Take care and be safe.

 

Sincerely,

Jessica L. Siefken

Spencer’s Mother and Founder of Tee It Up For Spencer

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Make a donation in memory of Spencer today!

Spencer's Story

My due date was February 25, 2015. We made the decision after becoming pregnant that the gender of our baby was going to be a surprise. Being of advanced maternal age at 35, my doctor decided that if we didn’t have the baby on 2/25 that I would need to be induced on 2/27. I chose to keep my appointment on February 25th, thinking if we had not had our baby by then, the doctor could check and anticipate our baby’s arrival. On the day of my appointment, I was taking videos in the lobby of our baby moving in my stomach. I told our doctor, our baby was more active than usual.  I joked that I had eaten lemon cake and orange juice for breakfast and the doctor said that is why the baby is so active. The doctor told me I was at 3 cm and that I should go home and walk around. I was a ticking time bomb, he stated.

 

On Friday, February 27th at 4:45 a.m. I got up to take a shower, looked in the mirror and thought  to myself, today is the day I’m going to be a mom. I had a hard time believing it, as this would be my first child. After my shower, our baby’s father, John, came storming in and said, “Well who can sleep at a time like this?” I called the Sanford Birth Center, by 5 a.m. to ensure we could move forward with the induction at 7 a.m. I was told there had been a number of births overnight and I should call back at 2 p.m. when they would know more.

 

After I hung up the phone, I went to the bathroom to tell John they could not get us in until the afternoon. We were a bit disappointed. John decided to go to work as the waiting game was too much for him.  Living in Wahpeton, North Dakota we were 50 miles south of Fargo where we would have our baby. My parents, Bob and Vicki and sister, Jennifer, drove from Dickinson, North Dakota the night prior and had checked into a hotel in Fargo. I told my parents and sister they could drive down to Wahpeton and pick me up for lunch and John would meet us at the hospital. I called the hospital a few times that afternoon and they told me they could get us in at 3 p.m. Before my parents left to come get me, I asked that we not talk about labor or the delivery. Since this was my first baby I wanted to remain calm. They assured me they would not discuss. I texted John to let him know the plan and he texted back saying that he was getting excited…boy or girl?? Girl or boy??, he questioned. He told me he downloaded 23 hours of classical music, as he was anticipating a long night of labor.

 

We checked into the hospital at 3 p.m. and John met me as planned. My parents and sister went back to the hotel where they would wait until our call that the baby had arrived. John’s mother, Liz, came up for a quick visit. Right after she left they broke my water which was around 8 p.m. Shortly after they broke my water, I progressed to 6 cm at which time the epidural was administered. In an hour and a half I had progressed another 4 cm to 10 cm! I was thrilled, we were thrilled! I started to push per the nurse’s instructions. I was then asked to stop pushing until a doctor was available. Our baby had the umbilical cord wrapped around it’s neck and both my heartbeat and our baby’s heartbeat were dropping. They gave me an oxygen mask and told me to focus on my breathing which I did with John’s assistance.

 

I remember the NICU being on stand-by along with talk of forceps, a vacuum, and a possible C-section and hoping my baby is not going to have a cone head. The doctor told me one more push or we would have to resort to another method. Thankfully, we did not need any of these things…one more push and our baby was free!! John pushed as hard, if not harder as the nurses’ commented. When they laid our baby on my chest, I was admiring that beautiful complexion, perfect ears, a head full of hair, and trying to determine who our baby looked like…when John burst into tears of joy, “It’s a…BOY!!!!” he exclaimed.

 

We named our baby after his father, John Spencer Reimer II but he would go by Spencer. He was born at 12:17am, 7lbs. 9oz. and 20.5” long. Spencer was adored by everyone. He was the first grandchild for my parents and it had been quite some time since John’s family had a grandchild. We joked about all of the videos my mom and sister were taking.  I referred to them as the paparazzi and said, you would’ve thought we had given birth to a prince!

 

Everything was going really well. John and I were very active parents picking up on Spencer’s cues. He was only in the nursery for a total of 4 hours in 2 hour increments. The pediatrician came in and checked Spencer’s vitals and reassured us that everything looked great before being discharged home. Spencer had lost 9% of his birth weight but the doctor reassured us that was nothing out of the ordinary. I set up a follow-up appointment with the lactation consultant for that next week since I was breastfeeding. We got Spencer home where we enjoyed changing his diapers, holding him, and feeding him. On 3/02, John went to bed around 9:30 p.m. I told him goodnight and that Spencer and I were the best things that ever happened to him. Spencer and I went to bed around 10:30 p.m. that night. I was a bit worried about him not eating enough but thought this was typical being a first-time mom. I thought I’d talk to John in the morning to discuss substituting formula. I last laid Spencer down around 5:30 a.m. We were both sleeping when John came in the bedroom to see Spencer and the look on his face was not good. I asked him what was wrong and I got a worried look. I said, well, pick him up! He shook his head, no. I looked at Spencer, he was cold and blue. I immediately picked him up and told John to call 9-1-1. John stared at the phone with a blank stare. I called 9-1-1, started CPR and tossed the phone to John. The last thing I know the paramedics were administering CPR and rushing Spencer to the hospital. When we arrived at the hospital, Spencer was being held with no tubes or anything else attached. I knew that he was gone when I looked at the woman’s face and we were invited into a room.  When we got into the room, they confirmed that Spencer had passed away. The doctor on call explained that the newborn test screening results were in and that Sanford Hospital in Fargo had been trying to get a hold of us since the results showed that Spencer tested positive for Medium-chain acyl-coenzyme A dehydrogenase deficiency (MCADD). They told us they could not tell us for certain that this is what caused his death. I sat in the that room for 3 hours sobbing, saying over and over I did NOT want to let him go, I did NOT want to let my baby go. They told us I didn’t have to. Our pastor was there and I explained how I didn’t know how bad I wanted to be a mom until I was. The pastor reassured me I will always be a mom. I explained how I lost my grandmother whom I was very close to six months prior to Spencer’s birth and within two months of his birth I had to put my dog down. I already lost so much, so soon, and with post-partum, hormone levels, physically healing, my milk soon to come in (without our baby to feed), and never giving birth before, I did not know how I was going to handle it all. My pastor and the grief support counselor told me they would get me into counseling right away.

 

After 3 hours I gave Spencer to the grief support counselor. I was comforted that Spencer would be with my grandmother, Liz and my dog, Gracie. We left the hospital and went home where we met with law enforcement. They had to do a routine check to make sure there was no foul play. Afterwards, I noticed that I called 9-1-1 at 9:06 a.m. and that Sanford left voicemails starting at 9:14 a.m. indicating to get our baby to the hospital right away due to the newborn test screening results.  In those few hours we had a call from Life Source who wanted to know if we would be willing to have Spencer’s heart valves and skin tissues donated. We agreed to do that. Spencer was taken to Grand Forks, ND for an autopsy. The pathologist called and told us Spencer most likely died from complications of MCADD as he had an enlarged liver and was slightly dehydrated. The pathologist explained that if we went on to have other children we would be able to be tested for this during pregnancy, now that there is a history of it. The pathologist also explained had we known about Spencer’s condition, he could have gone on to live a normal, healthy life with a special diet.

 

I am so grateful for the wonderful memories and if I had to do it all over again, I would not change a thing. Spencer’s birth was the best day of my life as I have loved no one like I have him. I promise to carry my sweet boy in my heart and make him proud of me for the rest of my days. Until we meet again little Spence…

 

Love Always,

Momma xoxo

 

 

Thank you to our Sponsors!

Register today!

Registration deadline: June 5, 2020

Early-Bird pricing through April 3rd. Save $25 per golfer!!

Details

  • Schedule of Events

    Saturday, June 13, 2020

     

    10 a.m. – Golf Registration, Driving Range Opens

    11 a.m. Golfers tee off (Tee Times will be assigned)

    12 p.m. Lunch

    4 p.m. – Cocktail/Social Hour

    5:30 p.m. – Dinner, Program & Awards

    7 p.m. – Memorial Lanterns Release

  • Location

    Rose Creek Golf Course

    1500 East Rose Creek Pkwy S

    Fargo, ND 58104

     

  • Golf & Dinner

    Individual Golf: $150 (includes golf, cart, lunch & dinner). Save $25 through April 3rd

    Team/Foursome: $600 (includes golf, cart, lunch & dinner). Save $100 through April 3rd

    Dinner Only: $50

     

    Registration deadline: June 5, 2020

Interested in becoming a sponsor?

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2018 Tee It Up For Spencer Gallery